Last night for the first time in many years, I had one of those uncomfortable teacher dreams that used to haunt me in my younger days. I was in a classroom with a group of students. The principal, Jack Funkhouser, came in and announced that he was going to observe me. I told him that it was not the best of times, but did not ask him to come back later.

I got the students seated and spent what seemed like forever fumbling around looking for the materials I needed for the lesson. Jack saw something insteresting in one of the cabinets and spent the rest of the time ignoring me and looking through the room to see what all I had. It was uncomfortable having hm in the room, with the self-realization that I was totally unprepared.

For me, this is the equivalent to the "realizing you're naked at school" dream I have heard other people claim to have. You are frantic trying to appear in control while fumbling around trying to get a grip on the situation.

I know why I had this dream. It was my subconcious worrying about next year. Scince my CIT job is being phased out, I am anxious about the future. Will I try for and get one of the coveted coaching positions? Will I go back to special education? Will I become a regular elementary school classroom teacher? All of these possibilities bring their own worries.

To get the coaching job means interviewing again. That was a miserable experience for me the last time. I honestly don't know if I want to go through it again. However, I know I will have to suck it up and go for it, if I decide to take that route.

The thought of going back to special education makes me nervous. I have been out of that field for nearly 17 years. I would basically be a new teacher. The same thing applies to the thought of going into a regular classroom position. I worry that this old dog might not be able to learn enough new tricks to cut the mustard. It is frightening to me that a 35-year veteran teacher could be so unsure of himself this late in the game.

I also know why Jack was in the dream looking for things. He came into my lab yesterday looking for something he needed. While he was there, he "shopped" around looking for other things of interest. I was happy to see someone take some of the stuff that is just wasting aawaay on the shelves.

Whatever path my future takes, I know on a deep level that I will be fine. I have a good work ethic. I am a quick learner. Also, I have a personal history of being able to rise to any occcasion. I am sure that this will be no exception. On top of that, I have faith in a god who drives my life as He sees fit. All will be well.